Sandpaper

On the Rough Rider Super Studded condom dispenser in the mens' restroom "80 Grit."

Quote

It is mathematical fact that the casting of this pebble from my hand alters the center of gravity of the universe.

--Thomas Carlyle

Germs

Every time that I get stressed out about germs I think of how many men take dumps in public restrooms and don't wash their hands.  If I haven't been killed by rest stop germs yet, I figure that it's unlikely that I ever will.

Quote

Not every end is a goal. The end of a melody is not its goal; but nonetheless, if the melody had not reached its end, it would not have reached its goal.

--Friedrich Nietzsche

Haiku

The women cling
with false fingernails
to their youth.

Shrimp

I just saw a cocktail shrimp in a urinal. I don't think I have ever seen that before.  For some reason, I never think of seafood while I am urinating.

Overheard Conversation

A thirteen-to-fifteen year old boy walking out of a restaurant in front of his family:  "And you won't get it any time soon, I guarantee you that."