Quote

Between our two lives
there is also the life of the
cherry blossom.

--Basho

Beauty and Humor

I am having some difficulty figuring out how to make something that is beautiful humorous, or humorous beautiful.  Are they mutually exclusive?  I'm not sure on this one. 

Haiku

Hovering,
The seagull drops the clam
precisely on the rock.

Quote

I live my life in widening circles that reach out across the world.  I may not complete this last one but I give myself to it.

--Rainer Maria Rilke

Parenting

What good parent hasn't fallen asleep in a child's bed, or spent half a night awake comforting a nightmare?  I've been thinking about why we do it--put ourselves out for our children in strenuous and exhausting ways?  I am pretty sure that it is because children are our long-term-care policies, and if we don't fuck them up too much, they will change our diapers when we get old. 

Library People

A large, unshaven man wearing a black fishing cap asked a library assistant if a computer was available.  It was, but was filtered.  He said, "It's filtered for all users all the time?  I sure don't want that," and walked away.  The assistant looked in disgust at another employee and went back to work.

Quote

Outside noisy, inside empty.   --Chinese proverb

Fake Swearing

I've noticed that people often make up swear words to keep from saying things that might soil their childrens' sensitive ears.  Personally, I don't care if a person says "shit" or "shoot", they all mean the same thing.  It is an assortment of letters that our society places more value on.  Apart from a couple weird folk, everyone I know swears at one time or another.  But, in the interest of this post, I will put down a few words that people have created to say the same thing with different words:

Frickin' eyesole
Spanky punt
Bass bird
Mother ducker

And then there are the ones I use on a regular basis:

Pinko Commie Bastard
Scheißen
Merde

Swearing in other languages is very effective, because you get all the benefits of swearing without bothering English language speakers.

Politics

After years as an independent, I have finally found a political party that I can agree with: the Yemeni National Party.  They have a solid foundation and do well in the parts of the Middle East, but their presence in America is a bit weak.

Advertisment

I saw this ad while checking e-mail:  "Is it still possible to pursue happiness when gas costs four bucks a gallon?"  Below this question, there were two check boxes for "yes" and "no". 

It reminded me of the junior high "Do you like me" notes that I wrote. 

Of course it is impossible to pursue happiness with gas at four bucks.  I'm fine when its in the threes, but that little bump in price is all it takes to send me into existential despair.

Image

Here's an interesting one:  an agorophobic claustrophobe.  He can't go outside, but hates living indoors.

Humans

Why is it that humans live for such a long time after their reproductive ability has stopped?  We have a good twenty to thirty years after we can't have kids that we are kicking around.  I'm not sure on the purpose of our elderly years, other than keeping the motor home manufacturers in business.